The Closet Moderate: The Code of the Schoolyard

Thursday, July 23, 2009

The Code of the Schoolyard


I had a college professor who explained the specific way IR scholars use the terms "anarchy" and "hierarchy" as follows:

I went to Catholic school, and we had a nun who would watch over us as recess, Sister Mary--she would twist your ear good and hard if she caught you up to no good. When Sister Mary was on the playground we had hierarchy. If a bully acted up, you could go to her and she would twist, Lord, how she would twist his ear. But when she stepped away for a smoke, we had anarchy. The powerful did what they pleased and the rest of us had to stay out of their way.

Apt, no? Lately, though, we've seen the schoolyard manifest itself more in terms of rhetoric than structure.

Secretary of State Clinton on the DPRK:
What we've seen is this constant demand for attention, and maybe it's the mother in me or the experience that I've had with small children and unruly teenagers and people who are demanding attention. Don't give it to them. They don't deserve it.

The North Korean Foreign Ministry
:
We cannot but regard Mrs. Clinton as a funny lady as she likes to utter such rhetoric, unaware of the elementary etiquette in the international community. Sometimes she looks like a primary schoolgirl and sometimes a pensioner going shopping.
Proving, if nothing else, that busting on pastel pantsuits is a sport for all seasons.

Fun Fact [Not Actually A Fact]: In 1952, a combined DPRK/Chinese task force first developed "the People's Elbow" for use in the Korean War [proof above]. In 2005, an IP suit brought on behalf of Chairman Mao's embalmed corpse forced Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson to retire his signature move.

1 comment:

Silent Cal said...

I agree with Hillary 100%.

This fulfills the terms of an ill-considered suicide pact I made in 1995, so I'm off to buy some hemlock.